I went to a Pampered Chef party this last week. Surprised? I was because I hadn't heard of any parties recently. And when I say recently I mean in the last four to five years. I guess people have been busy hosting Lia Sophia and Scentsy and Pajama parties. Honestly Pampered Chef has been out of vogue for several years. But they are still here and trying to kick strong.
I went to this party, not expecting anything new and maybe some good treats. I was dead on with the first thing and so far off on the second. The hostess was making us a "Whole Meal!" How exciting except that I didn't bring the whole family and they needed to be fed as soon as the party was over. She made this pasta entree in a $75 stoneware crock and microwaved everything. (I know it's a personal opinion but, microwaves should not be used for cooking.) She made quite the show of the microwaved grape tomatoes and garlic that she mashed up with her wooden utensils she pulled out of her plasticky turntable. I've never seen mashed tomatoes and garlic before, thank you!
Then she proceeded to show us how to dice chicken with the one-of-a-kind Pampered Chef Chopper. Granted, it's a pretty cool device. No need to have oniony-crying eyes with this contraption. But you can get one anywhere nowadays, and lots cheaper. And it doesn't dice, it chops. Next was the pasta cooked al dente and some other stuff, including Fresh Basil snipped from her garden that very day. She threw it all together and microwaved it again and. . .Voila! Dinner. Except my family wouldn't eat it, so it's a good thing I didn't bring them.
For dessert we had microwaved cake. Yes, you read that correctly. M i c r o w a v e d C a k e. I must reiterate, Microwaves should not be used for cooking. She mixed the batter up in the Batter Bowls that come with an "Nifty Pouring Device" a.k.a. the Spout. (I seriously couldn't make this stuff up.) I gracefully declined because I had already had a piece of that NieNie Mud Cake and that is enough calories for six days. Sister in Law Nurse had some and after one bite whispered "It tastes microwaved." I can not make this clearer, Microwaves should not be used for cooking
The Dénouement came with the comparison of store-bought cookie dough baked on regular pans v. stoneware. I have done the taste test a million times. Maybe not quite a million, but a few hundred. Definitely like the pans better. But of course our hostess deferred to the stoneware; those stones bring a much higher commission than the pans. The best part came while pulling the cookies from the oven. She extolled the virtues of the cooling racks, "They can be stacked three high!" "Why stop at three?" I asked, ever the problem child. She chose to ignore my comment for the moment. She obviously hasn't seen a New York City kitchen. Dont' worry Girls, I've got your back. But a few minutes later she disdainfully remarked they could be stacked higher if you wanted to chance it. Snotty Rich Doctor's Wives Who've Never Worked a Day in Their Life with the Kitchen Islands Larger than a Dining Room Table and Fresh Basil and Thyme Growing in their Garden. And that brought another lovely Pampered Chef Party to a close. Proving that Pampered Chef is Here to Stay. At least in Utah County.